Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Reality TV.

The scene: Jill and Husband are cleaning the house in preparation of my mom's arrival.

Husband: What's that burning smell?

Jill: Ack! What burning smell? Is it the vacuum?

Husband and Jill inspect the vacuum while smoke fills the upstairs.

Husband: Maybe it's coming from outside through the open window...

Jill runs downstairs.

Jill: It's down here! It's the tv! It's on FIRE!

Husband runs downstairs and disconnects the tv. It was plugged in but not turned on. The tv spontaneously combusted and was spewing sparks and acrid fumes from the burnt plastic. A horrible cracking and hissing sound was coming from the wood of the armoire.

Husband: I've never seen anything like this.

Jill, becoming semi-hysterical: We are lucky to have been home when this happened. Holy cow, we are SO blessed. Can you imagine if this happened in the middle of the night? What if we hadn't been here? We shouldn't have been here right now. The whole place would have burned down. The cats - OMG the cats. We would have lost the cats if we had been asleep or not home. Ack!

Husband: Okay, okay. It's alright. Hmph. This tv is new - it's only 5 years old, I don't get it.

Jill: Are burnt plastic fumes fatal? I have a headache. And my throat hurts. Do you have a headache? Do you think the cats are going to keel over from the fumes?

Husband, rolling his eyes: Oy Vey.