Thursday, June 03, 2004

Today I Want To Be...Wonder Woman

I spent 2 hours on a massage table today as my massage therapist attempted to work the knots out of my back. I have been unable to move my head from side to side for 2 days. My chiropractor asked me why I was so stressed. I answered his question by bursting into tears.

The blood incident today has left me emotionally devastated. My mom has bloody-purple blotches all over her body. Her legs are solid purple. Her arms have pancake sized blood bruises all over them. She is covered with bandaids. The illness is called TTP, which stands for Thrombotic thrombocytopenic purpura. Basically, mom has a low platelet count which causes these blood clots to form just under the skin. It's truly ghastly. She's forever saying that she doesn't feel well, and for good reason. Other symptoms include a general feeling of sickness to the stomach, headaches, and fever.

I plan to talk to my dad to find out more about their health insurance. I'd like to take mom to Stanford or UC San Francisco to get checked out. Take one look at her and you have to wonder if her doctors in Riverside are doing all that can be done. If so, we're in trouble.

I need to take a walk outside with my husband. I need to breathe. I need to get some kind of fucking superpower to fix this.