Sunday, June 05, 2005

Dear JoMama and Patti-Ann,

I miss you so much.

There are alot of things that I wish I had done differently to let you know how much I love you. I want to reverse time so badly. I want to see you again, to hug you like a barnacle.

I didn't realize that either of you were going to pass away when you did. I wasn't prepared. And I'm having a really hard time with acceptance. Every day, I think about picking up the phone to call each of you. But your numbers have been disconnected. These numbers that you both had for so long that they became synonymous with you. What was, now isn't.

It's utterly impossible to outrun this sadness. I'm trying, believe me, but it can't be done. So I cry and hope that one day this gaping whole in my heart will mend.

I miss you both so, so much. And I love you deeply, all the way down to my bone marrow.